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Upon entering the Deen home in Queens, NY, there is an immediate sense one has fallen back in time by 50 years. Background noise doesn't exist...and there are no television sets in the home. The couple's laptops are tucked away in a closet after-hours, and the Deen's toddler has already learned how to read children's books. The decision to kill television viewing was anarchistic in a media addicted society the couple contend, but the Deens are no longer the only family in their neighborhood without television.
Nationwide however, one in five "babies" under the age of 2-years-old have their own television set next to their cribs reports the American Academy of Pediatrics.
More than 80 percent of babies under the age of 6-years-old in the United States watch television and play video games on the computer for at least two hours per day. Thirty-two percent of babies live in a home that has television turned on all hours except when the family is tucked-away sleeping, so concludes results of the Academy.
"Television changes a child's focus and prevents family communication," said Karin Deen. "And I'm sorry, but TVs don't replace human interaction no matter what other parents think." Deen and her husband Andrew donated their televisions to charity in 2002 and live without broadcast while raising their 3-year-old daughter Stacey. "She does not know television in this house. She reads books, colors, and enjoys helping me in the kitchen preparing for dinner," said Karin.
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Circa 1955 - 1965 as remembered by Mike Deen Profile male 27-37 years old
Circa 1995 - 2005 average profile male 27-37 years old
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The Kaiser Family Foundation in a follow-up survey with parents concluded that not only had today's parents grown up glued to television, the overwhelming majority of parents believe that television occupies the children so that the parent doesn't have to. Parents say the do not have time for babysitting their own children in today's hectic pace.
Karin said that in her view, Stacey is already more advanced with reading and simple math skills than children her own age. "See, there is a difference between us and those parents in the study. We waited to have a child until we were ready to really raise the child and accept responsibility for that child.
"I am deeply distressed by how society has, by default, accepted raising children today. Parents do not accept responsibility, so how can anyone blame the children for being irresponsible too? You think I want my child to act like those kids I see on the subway? Well, she won't that's it," Karin said.
In her career as an HR consultant, Karin said she sees the influences television and Internet broadcast have had on young recruits. "They lack basic communication skills, they mumble, they can't pay attention to simple questions during a job interview and yet they have advanced college degrees," she said.
Contrast the Deen family's routine with those from the Academy's research: "My reasoning was that my little boy was extremely intelligent since birth," reports one mother. "At 1-year-old, he was putting his own DVDs in, skipping scenes," the mother told researchers. "I thought it was a real good thing for him to have his own TV, because TV helped him grow at a very young age."
Furthermore, while parents said violent or gory television shows did not phase the children, they would only allow the baby to watch violent shows when the parents were present. One mother told Kaiser that she did urge her 3-year-old daughter to stop watching the television show ER after she attempted to perform CPR on her little brother.
"Those parents are clearly lacking fundamental knowledge of child-rearing," said Karin. "I'm upset by what we have seen on TV in the past. How can a baby process what she sees?"
The Deens read the research report provided by Think & Ask. "Well, this is why our daughter will be going to private school," said Andrew. "This is a quality of life issue. Advanced education is the only way to survive today, because the general public is below the standards we've set for our own lives.
"This study proves to me we are doing right by Stacey," Andrew said.
The National Institutes of Health (NIH) would likely agree with Deens and is calling for more funding and research to better understand the long term affects of all electronic media on child development in the United States. NIH recommends that no child under the age of 2-years-old watch television or play on computers.
Dr. Daniel Broughton of the Mayo Clinic, co-author of the recommendations, said that brain development prior to 2-years-old is rapid and that human interaction is necessary to stay connected to the human world. Television is a distant, fantastic world with no basis for reality, he concluded.
Broughton said it is important for a balance of activities for children to include minimal television watching along with playing with friends and contributing to household chores.
The Deens do not allow their daughter on a computer either. "We each have a laptop for work and when we come home, our laptops stay in the closet. When Stacey is old enough she'll learn the computer, but she is too young," Karin said.
Andrew summed-up his thoughts, "I'm 45 [years old] so I'm considered old for raising a child. But I'm glad I waited, because 20 years ago, I'd probably be like these other parents and plop Stacey down in front of the TV for hours at a time, or allow her to cruise the Internet to keep her occupied."
Andrew describes time with his daughter as "pure quality. When I come home we sit on the sofa and she reads to me." After dinner time, the Deens engage Stacey in playtime with puzzles and board games before bedtime.
Stacey's only surviving grandparent, Mike Deen concurs with how his son and daughter-in-law are raising his granddaughter. "We didn't allow Andy much television either, and he probably rebelled a bit, but I'm glad to see he applies restrictions to Stacey. She's a remarkable little girl and will truly make something of her life without these societal pressures."
Mike said that when he was first married in 1955, family life was wholesome. "Not everyone had a TV. We spent time with our friends and extended families. I don't see that today. We've created a culture of disconnected, largely uneducated people."
The Deens realize they are bucking a trend. "How odd is it that we might seem abusive to disallow electronic influences on Stacey?" asked Karin, 41. "But guess what? The Cusaks (next door neighbors) have a baby now and they dumped their four televisions too." Karin said that the neighbors decided to raise their boy without electronic influences after having observed Stacey.
Cecilia Cusak, 38, said she and her husband watched the Deens raise Stacey with great interest. "We were planning to have a child one day, and when Stacey was 2 (years old) it was a no brainer.
"Stacey is just so communicative, she is so engaged with the world around her," Cusak said.
From time to time Cusak would babysit Stacey, "It was remarkable how well behaved she is too. She is the only child I have seen since my own childhood that doesn't cause a scene in public. You can take her anywhere and she is just an angel."
"She is the exact opposite of those kids we've observed in our own family," Cusak said, and while she admits that she and her husband were "probably addicted to TV," after tossing-out the television sets in late 2005, not only did their lives improve "without the clutter, but my husband and I grew more romantic with each other. We are more in love now after 10 years of marriage and that is not because of having a baby. I say romance is possible without having a TV."
She added that the responsibilities of raising a child, "really do require all of your time."
"Listen, I do wish for those days dad (Mike) describes," Karin said, "lazy weekends planning BBQs with the neighbors...but we don't even know all our neighbors today. The Deens and Cusaks have grown much closer as friends as a result. "We have this anti-society trend we share," Andrew said. "But I'll tell you, more of the neighbors are beginning to question their television habits too."
On the relatively quiet street, one neighbor walking her dog who asked not to be identified said, "Oh yeah, every knows they don't have television anymore," she laughed. "I do think it makes sense these days, and we have made a little effort to cut-back watching TV, but you know what they say about old habits."
Karin suggests that, "Maybe if more parents started to raise their children without these unnecessary evils we could breed a truly better society instead of one large emotionally disconnected populous."
Media should be used more wisely than as a babysitter, Dr. Dimitri Christakas of the University of Washington told the Associated Press.
"People have made dinner for millennia, but we've only had television for 50 years," he said. "Television's not inherently good or bad. The real goal now has to be not to de-technologize childhood, but how to optimize children's experiences" with it.
The American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry (AACAP) reports that the average child watches four hours of television each day and that by age 18 the child would spent more time infront of the television than inside a classroom.
"They often can not tell the difference between the fantasy presented on television and reality. They are influenced by the thousands of commercials seen each year, many of which are for alcohol, junk food, fast foods, and toys," concludes the AACAP.
Children who watch television are likely to have lower grades on average, read much less, experience attention deficit, and be overweight.
The AACAP recommends that parents who insist upon television use as entertainment at least "choose shows that meet the developmental needs of your child" and prohibit long blocks of time in front of the television set.
In February 2006 Internet research company JupiterResearch concluded that of 3,000 Internet users the average user spent 14 hours online per week or the same amount of time spent watching television.
Mike said of the statistics, "All of that time wasted. Fifty-years ago that 28-hours of time was spent socializing or raising a family. I'd bet these same folks spend as much time on their cell phones too.
"Well, who cares what this old man observes about today's ills. My time is almost up anyway," Mike said. "I'm glad to have been part of a better time."
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